It’s amateur hour in the White House.
Or had you not noticed?
President Trump’s arrogant dismissal of the press and its long-standing commitment to the first amendment has already cost him one of his most trusted advisors. General Michael Flynn, Trump’s choice for National Security adviser lasted a laughable 24 days on the job raising questions about the administration’s early claims that they would hire only the best, most tremendous people.
To be fair to the administration, the average amount of time spent in the office is usually 2.6 years and to beat that score by over 2.5 years goes beyond tremendous. It’s an achievement of bigly proportions.
Slow clap for the omnishambles. Preferably to the tune of a twee Irish ditty.
Flynn Dizzy
Not that the fun stopped there.
Flynn’s resignation was compounded by further reports from the Washington Post that Trump was well aware that Flynn had spoken to the Russians. He simply didn’t care.
With Trump’s personal relationship with the truth on less secure footing than his relationship with his daughter Tiffany, the idea that he would object to the obfuscation of a criminal act is absurd. That Flynn offered Trump’s Russian benefactors the political equivalent of a lame duck rim-job, that he broke the law, that the man in charge of national security was vulnerable to blackmail.
That was all fine and dandy.
No, what actually angered Trump was that Flynn had lied about it in-house. Lying about illegal misconduct that compromised the security of the nation to the ‘dishonest press’ was one thing. But lying to Trump’s buddy Pence?
Not cool.
Kelly Anne Go Away
Not that the fun stopped there either.
It seems that a panicked Trump is making moves to distance himself from the talking upright-hoover attachment that is Kellyanne Conway.
Perhaps, with one eye on the fact that The Washington Post – a newspaper Trump has long derided — has taken down presidents before, the urge to shed dead weight like it’s the run up to a class reunion makes sense.
The self-styled guru of alternative facts has spent the past few weeks generating headlines of her own. Her ability to engage in sophistry so distasteful that at times she visibly throws up in her own mouth has won the hearts and minds of many.
Who else but Conaway could have defended presidential lies about the weather? Who else could have sold her soul to the antichrist for the dubious reward of being a public lickspittle with less integrity than a papier-mâché sex doll?
Surely, she can’t be on the way out as well?
Not Conway, say it ain’t so!
The Night Of The Little Knives
Newsflash: All of the official government accounts suddenly and without warning just stopped following her. Like, all of them.
You, @WhiteHouse and @POTUS all just unfollowed Kellyanne Connway… got something you wanna tell us?!?
— William LeGate (@williamlegate) February 14, 2017
Dead Meat And Tweet
What could it mean?
Perhaps Conway’s recent tweet to White Nationalists was a bridge too far even for a President with known connections to Neo-Nazi enthusiasts.
Maybe, Trump is finally beginning to realize that surrounding himself with the best people means those people capable of doing their jobs? People who have, you know, qualifications and shit.
At this point, who knows?
Conway might show up for work tomorrow morning, smile, flick back her hair, swallow a mouthful of warm sick, and say:
“It was an alternative sacking.”
And then, dear, god, we might be stuck with her forever.
Featured Image: Screenshot Via Twitter.
