Redneck Ammosexual Woman Opens Fire On Houseguests Who Stayed Too Long

If you’re planning a trip to Panama City, Florida, it’s best not to drop in on Alana Annette Savell and her boyfriend — even if they issue an invitation. The result could be a trip to the hospital for you, and a trip to the county jail for the trigger-happy Savell. That’s what happened early Monday morning when an unnamed couple joined Savell and her partner at their home for a night of drinking.

According to one of the victims, she and a friend had gone to Savell’s home in Panama City to drink. At some point, Savell decided her guests had become too loud, and she wanted them to leave.

Her Boyfriend Told Her To Shoot

Investigators said Savell’s boyfriend, known only as Ben, told them he instructed her to start shooting at their guests:

“Once someone is told to leave their property three times, she is to get the gun and shoot it at the ground. If that does not work, she is to shoot them in the leg.”

A statement issued by the Bay County Sheriff’s Office said Savell opened fire on the floor with a .22 caliber handgun. She continued shooting as her guests attempted to leave, firing at them from the doorway of the home. according to the sheriff’s affidavit:

“The defendant stated that she knew she was wrong for shotting [sic] at the victim… but stated when she started shooting she could not stop.”

One of the bullets struck the leg of her female houseguest. In what might be considered a fitting act of karmic retribution, another bullet hit Savell’s boyfriend in the leg. Perhaps he should have been a little more clear about telling Savell where to shoot.

After her houseguests made their escape, Savell allegedly threw the gun in the garbage. The sheriff’s affidavit states:

“She stated she knew she was in trouble and did not know what to do with it… She stated after placing it in the trash can someone removed it and took it somewhere else.”

After police were summoned to the hospital where the female victim was being treated, the 32-year-old Savell was arrested. She was charged with aggravated assault with a firearm and taken to the Bay County Jail, where she’s being held under a $100,000 bond. There’s no word yet on whether Ben will face charges.

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April Fox is a freelance writer from North Carolina. In 2009, she appeared on an Irish radio show to discuss an article she penned on the benefits of punk rock on child development. She writes a little bit about everything, but her interests lean primarily toward music, politics, and parenting and child development. Her books, Object Permanence, Spine, and Chicken Soup for the Fuck You, are available on Amazon and in stores around her hometown of Asheville, NC.