8 Reasons Why Your ‘Concern’ For Fat People Is Total Bullsh*t


You see it all the time: people respond to a fat person’s picture or social media post with, “I’m just concerned for your health.” It sounds harmless enough. But the reality is that it’s an insidious form of fat shaming, and it needs to end.

So here are the reasons why it’s total BS.

1. Because You’re Not A F**king Doctor

Seems obvious, right? You are not in a position to comment on someone else’s health status unless you are a healthcare professional with access to that person’s medical records. If you cannot put a check mark in each of these columns, you are unfit to be making a comment on someone’s health. And if your need to assess other people’s health becomes overwhelming, guess what? There’s always medical school. Graduate, pass your licensing exams, open a practise, THEN you can tell fat people they need to lose weight.

Image is by simpleinsomnia, available under a Creative Commons 2.0 Attribution-Sharealike license.
Image is by simpleinsomnia, available under a Creative Commons 2.0 Attribution-Sharealike license.

2. Because ‘Fat’ Is Not A Marker Of Illness

This one may come as a shocker to you, but recent research shows that overweight people are not at a greater risk for early death. In fact, folks in the “moderately overweight” category actually have a slightly longer life-expectancy than those in the “normal” range.

Yes, you read that right: fat people may live longer than thin people. But it has been so ingrained in our collective mindset that “fat” equals “unhealthy,” that it’s almost impossible to catch every negative thought. And if you are “concerned” for people’s health, you should probably be up on the latest research.

3. Because You Don’t Know Anyone’s Story

You don’t know if the person you’re concern trolling just ran a marathon, or if they just lost fifty pounds. Or if they just had a regular day like everyone else– trying to do the best they can. You don’t get to look down on someone based on your assumptions of their lifestyle based on your perceptions of their body, because you don’t know.

4. Because Everybody Has The Right To Body Confidence

Fat people don’t matter less than thin people. They don’t “deserve” to feel ashamed of their bodies. Our bodies are just the containers for our souls. There is way more to a person than their body, and everyone has the right to live in their bodies without feeling shame.

5. Because You Can’t Tell A Person’s Health By Their Appearance

Thin people can be sick. Fat people can be healthy. A beautiful woman walking down the street may have just been diagnosed with cancer, or has morbidly high blood pressure. There is no way that you can tell that someone is unhealthy by looking at their photo on Facebook.

So if you are making sure everyone knows how “concerned” you are for a fat person’s health, at best you are overreaching, and at worst you are just finding an excuse to call someone fat.

6. Because You’re Being a Jerk

Fat people don’t have to explain their fatness to you. They do not need to apologize for their bodies. And they certainly do not need to avoid posting pictures in order to prevent your delicate eyeballs from stumbling upon them.

If you feel put out by having to see images of fat people, that’s on you, not them. If you are trying to put it on them, you’re a jerk.

7. Because Fat Shaming Doesn’t Encourage People To Lose Weight

Let’s imagine that being fat is unhealthy, and you really do want to help them to be healthier. Calling them “fat” or any number of other fat-shaming slurs will not help them to lose weight.

Fat people know they’re fat. By commenting on their size, you’re making them feel judged and worthless, which leads to a stress response. Stress decreases a person’s ability to make positive choices. By causing a fat person to feel stress, you are actually decreasing the chances that they will be able to lose weight.

Although the above assumes that the fat person wants to lose weight. It is not your call whether someone else should lose weight.

8. Because You Are Not Allowed To Comment On Anyone Else’s Body. Ever.

Fat men experience what most women experience almost constantly: their bodies are treated as objects on display. Men (and other women) feel free to comment and judge, often right to the person’s face. Women receive cat-calls in the street (if they fit into the cultural norm of beauty), or calls of shame (if they don’t), as if the man looking at the women gets to be the judge of whether each woman he sees is attractive or not. It’s not okay.

It is never okay to comment on the esthetics anyone else’s body, and that has to be the end of the discussion.

People are not statues in an art gallery; we are all full human beings. We all deserve a life without constantly experiencing comments about our looks. Unless we ask someone for their feedback, we should expect to not receive any unsolicited opinions. Whether we are fat, thin, or in-between; tall, short, or completely average, our bodies are not for your eyes and your comments.

H/t to Everyday Feminism.